Fried

ha ha FAILED rice!
It is not salty enough.I always try avoid all artificial spices.
Should put on more hard work next time.
And the long beans are....kinda too long? And its not very cooked.
Cus I don't dump everything in one wok.

Still, it was a good try for me!
*applause*..................

Little storm

I'm actually very sleepy now but I really can't sleep.
I can't act like as if its nothing when I close my eyes.
Every single period of my life I face such things over and over again but each times it happens, it cuts me to the core.

Maybe I might seem like its nothing wrong when you step in and out of my life as you wish.
I promise I don't mean a particular person, instead, it is the many people that had appeared in my mind.
I have to deal with this kinda emotional struggles every time.
Since the day I knew how to appreciate I've started to experience this, over and over again, like a clip without a pause button.
I know different people come and go in every stage and I might seem like I have many people around me so it is right for me to feel ok.

But changes for me is never easy.
I really hate changes.
I admit I do complain that I'm tired and I wanna quit, but I know having faith isn't based on some feelings but also trust even when situation turns bad :'(

But I have to say that these changes that had brought me up to be who I am is really a big deal for me and I've come to see things in a whole new point of view

But I call to God,
and the LORD saves me.
Evening, morning and noon I cry out in my distress,
and he hears my voice. Psalm 55:16,17

I know He hears me, even through the finest whispers in my heart I know He hears.
But I really wanna feel that I'm being cared
Being appreciated.
To really feel that someone really understands.
Someone that really wanna hear.
I just need encouragements. Not mere words. I need something more than that.

I guess I'll just have to wait patiently.
Everything happens in its plan.
And I have whole lot more to improve myself! :)

I will always put my hope in God.
Somehow through all the cuts and falls, I know He's there to wipe my tears, and holding me, as He has promised.

I know,through this little storm He wants me to trust and believe :)
which I sometimes struggled to.
But I know He has more to teach. and even unanswered prayers are one of His blessings.
I know,because He loves me.

3:45am

It's VERY "early" and I just have to do it!

I am still awake now in Jes house with eeTing & pooisee, girls' sleep ovahh!

It's impossible for me to sleep now and we're gonna have mcD for "breakfast" at 4am.

I'm actually not feeling very well xD

however,

THE NIGHT IS STILL YOUNG BABEHH! XD
(we're just saying because its the word of the day.it's really late..so,goodnight)

the HOs

Me and my dear cousin.
He's same age as me.I know I looked much older.I'm starting to accept that, or maybe I'm just immune to that statement.

He came for a swim with me and my sis last weekend.
Chilling with ice-cream after swims ain't a wise decision but we enjoyed it.
*well,at least they did*......

And one great news about us is..

WE GOT OUR L LICENSE!

But a not-so-good-news for this is, I got a job as a Maxis telephonist in KLCC.
Which means I'm not gonna have a P license soon.
I wonder if I could have it before college starts.
But still,I'm really looking forward to the coming month ;P
yeahh,.surprise me with new stuff..

Going out for a tea with the LEOs soon.

Bring it on!

More Than an A: In my Life...

Girls are like chocolate:
They are very sweet at times and they never fail to bring a smile to your face when you're in low. You need them everywhere, but surely there are certain flavours that you would always choose to stick to.
They even contains bitter one in case you need someone to cry with. *The bitter the choc, the higher the percentage of cocoa*
They always have the most positive packaging and they never fail to cheer you up.

Possible side effects: Causing of extra fatness if you've chosen the wrong or low qualities ones.

Guys are like coffee(especially the special one):

Causing unusual heartbeats depending on individuals health conditions. Very addictive at times and you'll never cease to crave for more. Sometimes it's sweet,sometimes it's bitter.
If you know yourself well, you'll normally only cling to one particular type of coffee. It reveals a little of who you are sometimes.
You might encounter situations like: a sip of it may cause you to toss & turn whole night- only your brain is still awake and active. But you'll never regret drinking it, if that coffee is what you want ;)

Possible side effects: Causing insomnia depending on individuals health conditions, causes sleepiness and tiredness, effects negatively to the heart, sometimes unaffordable, and some only look good on the menu.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

More Than an A simply means More than an Article.
It can be JUST an article, or more.

I love to write and think and write... ha ha. I can't help it.
Inspirations can come from about any posible time and places.
Often alone in ktm or at home.

I use to write them down in my journal or if I don't have them with me I'll take out my phone and type them in. Because if I don't, I might loose it.

Anyway,
I just wanna share with you guys a little of me in my thoughts if you might wanna know what am I up to in my thoughts while I'm in my thoughts.LoL.
Do feel free to correct my mistakes ;) thank you.

Hope you guys like it! yeah..

Easter Sunday #2

Baked my very first own cake with my mom and sis today!
It turned out... well...


It's actually a butter cake. But it appeared to be like some sort of chocolate coffee cake.
*call me PRO*.....
It's really ugly. It's a new oven, so we don't know how to adjust it. Probably burnt or something.
Poor Jes is gonna be the new outsider trying it, because she's on her way to my house for other reasons :P


But, it tasted really nice actually. *In my HUMBLE OPINION*
Gonna do cup cakes soon and I promise it's gonna be way~~~~ BETTER than this!!


By the way ITS WEI REN'S birthday tomorrow!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WEI REN :)

Gonna go celebrate with him later with them. Gotta go prepare now.
Update you guys real soon, I've so much more to say/HAH!

*fyi,that cake is not for Wei Ren.so,...Good news for us.Bye! :)

Easter Sunday #1

Finally, it's my turn to go online.
I've been traveling around lately, with my close buddies and also to church.

I've also been helping out a little and participating the Station of the Cross organized by our church every year. Its always few days before Easter Sunday.

I helped out in preparing some of the props for some certain stations.
Which is:

The Blood stained Cloth

For a station about Jesus' garment being stripped.
How He was being condemned & humiliated completely to the extend that He was even completely stripped of any pride.



Jesus' body laid in the tomb
Obviously, this is just for the outer shape.
It is then wrapped with many layers of white clothe. *Really scary*
That's why I'm able to conteng it :D



MOST DISGUSTING ART WORKS I'VE EVER DONE IN MY LIFE!!

Lent is finally over and we've celebrated Jesus' resurrection today.
He is risen and still watching over us although God's will for Him is accomplished on earth, which is an amazing news that we're not left or abandoned as we also have our personal teacher -the Holy Spirit to journey with us.
Jesus is my best teacher :)

Beautiful morning with the church today.
Have a blessed Easter people!!

*mei zhi*
TEEHEE!

Error

It has been a week!! *Great, now I'm the slow updater*
Some problem with the sensitivity of the mouse,*freaking hamsters*,so I rather quit online for awhile while doing something useful*
-currently stoning & reading in my mom's office-

Something useful: Tidying my room, the house, spend more time with God, exercise, write & write, guitar..etc

Well,I only manage to do half of them everyday, so I came out with a timetable of almost all of the something useful inside.

And I've realized I've been rushing through my quiet time sometimes.
Almost neglected the whole entire point of Lent & Jesus' afflictions for me.

Again, every morning is indeed a miracle as I whisper silently "Good morning, Lord!" :)


However my days have not been as bored & dull as I used to complain.
I was kinda caught up in the trap of negativism which tries to eat me up from the inside but I was out.

Thanks to some friends that have called to asked me to think of the happy stuff. haha.
you know who you are ;)

The chill out with Jes that day and I really Laugh.My.Heart.Out <3
That moment when we paused and tried to find the word, and out of a sudden we said "HORNY!" spontaneously xD
However, please don't get us wrong. It wasn't a "horny chat".....ew?


And I've been really encouraged by the FB's inbox messeges you guys have sent me.
Especially some people that I've least expected :)

Like a person that sent starting with a Boo!=)
One saying "I'm there" as a friend, a bro,that was sweet.
And it's good to know someone stalked me and its a girl x)

All of you really mean alot to me.
Even thought we never got to chat, but still, I was rather encouraged.

big
Thankewwwww!

Levain

I went Levain last weekend for dinner??!
Yes,I had breads for dinner.
which is very very healthy i guess, and keeping the fats to the lowest! yeahh! :P
However, I hate it when this happens: I uploaded all the picture with a large image size which made the picts kinda blur. My apologies.
Shall double check next time!

Personally,I love this very very much.
Its the Criossant D'Amando. MUST TRY!
It's crispy on the outside & really soft in the inside.
Not very sweet, me likiee!

This is, uhm... I don't get its name.
But it tasted like some tomyam's ingredient on top with toast bread.
It sounds weird, but it tasted really good I love it!

I have nothing much to say about this.
It tasted normal,like something you can get it anywhere.
However the best part of it is, it looked nice :)
Like the eyes of an Ultra Man. wooohooo, my HERO!


And you guys seriously gotta try Cream Cheese Danish!!!
I don't have a pict of it, it looks like some normal bun-like-bread (..what?) but the cheese inside is AWESOME!
A few of us bought some home and I bought it for my mom to try out.
She loved it very much!
Some of them didn't buy it because it was all SOLD OUT.
Cool right? Highly recommended :) Must try!

Went Pavi for Snowflake as dessert.

And here goes our wonderful "bad habits" ;)

We camwhore in the public toilet since we know how to camwhore in the public toilet.
*which is once upon a time......*


But then we realized something had changed, something went not so right...

ugh..
Owh well, that ends our night.
Had a great time with all of them :)
Thanks guys!

xoxo

Hold On

I'm still waiting for my L license and it seems to be FOREVER! haha.
My dad would bug me over & over again, "when can you drive?"
He is really tired fetching us around, I know.
And he is really getting tired of DRIVING.
He has to travel from Kepong to Penang or Negeri Sembilan all the time so we hardly see him :(

I always wanted him to stay home very very much.
To spend time with us.
Or just his presence in the house makes very much of a difference.
I miss you,daddy.
I miss those times we chat like we're best friends!
And sometimes I'm the only one in the house catches your silly jokes.
Your sincere smile lights my day.And I miss it.

This morning I woke up realizing it was not early anymore & no one else is in the house.
All I can hear is the dead silence that surrounds the room.
I'm not at all,motivated to get of my bed.
I did my quiet time & it was really dry as I go through the words & verses.

This has not been the first time but I'm still feeling troubled.
It has lasted for quite awhile.
what is going on,God? :(

I wish there's a friend that who truly cares.
Or truly understands.
Not only asking me how am doing lately but really cares & listens sincerely.
I need a mentor, or someone that's spiritually mature to talk to.


I know some things are not for me to know at a certain time but for now I don't have a clue of it.
I need You,very very much as I need to breathe.
I have come to realized how vulnerable I am without Your strength & guidance.
I fall very easily.
But I know You're always there to catch me :)

I trust in you.
Trust that no matter what is going on around, You have Your way & may Your will be done in my life.
I'm still learning & I know You love me very much.
Still,I'm waiting. For anything You wanna say to me.
Longing for YOU.

I will hold on! :)
Stay strong beatrice!

Everything is gonna be fine.OK?

Unoccupied

Yes yes, I know. I'm such a poser..

This photo is taken like a year ago.
where I just bought a guitar & can't wait to pose with it.heh ;D

This morning I tried playing my guitar & my fingers hurt like I've been playing for hours,which idk why. This is rare.
I tried to continue but I just couldn't bear with it.

I can't wait to see dearVenn this friday again!
Time is freaking slow.*Owh,PATIENT..*

Wonder what else can I do today.
And Jes,when are we gonna play a song together?



I wanna try cooking something today.
I wanna have a cup of yogurt.
I wanna do a long journal.
I wanna go out for a movie.
I wanna immerse myself in deep thoughts.
I wanna run.
I wanna tweet.
I wanna receive a random call.

ughh,
I'M BORED.




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Jogs

Awesome jog in FRIM last sat with Beekhee & Zach.
It was really hard at first. But I'm able to catch up the flow after a while.

However, the canopy walk was closed so we didn't manage to experience it together.
But it's not like we have not tried. Blahh!

Lomo? ;)

Again,had I Love Yoo! for breakfast.


Gonna do jogging more often!
Not trynna slim down,just wanna be healthy.LOL.

Anyway guys....
I'm gonna get my mic soooooooon!!
It cost around 80bucks excluding the mic stand.

The reason I wanna get it mainly because I wanna try out doing some covers.
Also wanna have fun with my sister.

I can't sing very well,I love singing ;)

God bless you people!



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Eighteen-ager

As an eighteen-ager, you....


wanna have your own fashion.
adapt a certain lifestyle.
chase the weirdest dream.
no longer compare with others but yourself.
wanna treasure some old friends, you wanna meet more new friends.
don't mind spending on things with better quality.
wanna scream like crazy at times.
know when to cry.
wanna be real crazy, but you can be real steady.
just wanna be different, no matter what it takes.
know how to learn from your own mistakes.
enjoy making your own choices.
wanna fly so badly, you still wanna stay under their wings.
know how to obey, you learn how to be wise.
are very independent, but you choose to depend on God.



*note: If you're an eighteen-ager & none of these points are relevant to you, its either you're growing too fast, or you're not growing. *I'm just sayin!!!*

GOD BLESS! ;D

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Officepirations

When to my mom office yesterday to get inspired.
Her office is just full of colors which really made my day,sometimes.

Journalling

Brought my journal book as well to jot down any thoughts, even songs.

The Myanmar workers

The Attention-seeker

Extroverted

Reliable

Mom took a half day off to buy some electronic stuff which is on sales in a nearby factory.

My mom wanted to bake with us very much. She bought an oven as well.
And stuff like bowl mixer, steamboat pot, toaster etc.
She's going for a 2nd round later..... *Goshh spender*

Anyway I just came back from jogging with Zach & Beekhee in FRIM.
I miss the nature a lot!
But I also realized I have to exercise more often from now.
PERSEVERANCE!

Gotta prepare for praise & worship for MYF later :)
Saturday is awesome.

*Fun fun fun fun, looking forward to the weekend*-FRIDAY by Rebecca Black

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Attention-seekers

Attention? well everybody have one, at least.
EVERYONE likes attention ;)
I meant, I really like attentions. *Nobody doesn't like,hah*

It doesn't matter who or how old you are.

Look at them.

However, that's not my point.

Sometimes I wonder why some people couldn't live without attentions.
They'll try every ways, to get the attention. To make sure every eyes are on them from time to time, and if they don't, they'll feel really insecure.

From my point of view, attention are privilege.
Sometimes the harder you pursue, the harder you find to reach it.
Take the initiative & wait patiently instead.
Nobody carries any responsibility to give us full attention.

As long as they did not intentionally push you aside, you're not being left out.
Maybe it's just the wrong timing you're around, or they're just the wrong person for you that moment.
Sometimes don't forget to give attention to the people around you that's feeling so alone.

I do felt left out sometimes.
Especially when I'm alone in a new place or environment, where everyone have their own clicks already. I'll just have to find people that'll accept me.
I've faced rejections since I'm in primary school until now, but I also have friends that will look for me when I'm lost.

God had given us the full attention as well. He's watching over us everyday.
If we ever felt left out, or got ignored, maybe its time where we turn our eyes & seek His face,again.

And in case you don't know, God wants your attention as well.
How many times have we been busying seeking the worldly attention, and have Him being 'left out'?

LMHO

Indeed, I had a great time. Again hanging out with people I loved sincerely.
Though its sad that we don't have Becky, Denise, Joanna & Z-wei with us this time :(
But still I had a great time.

*Except having that lil burnt scar right on the center of my face while frying fish days ago*

Watched The Adjustment Bureau.

I love this show very much. Basically it kept me thinking over & over again.
Like how Avatar & Inception did. which mean its a GOOD SHOW :)

It's about David (Matt Damon), the youngest senator is set to be the future President of the US. But only if his romance with the pretty ballerina, Elise (Emily Blunt) doesn't reach fruition. And this condition has been laid down by the Adjustment Bureau, a bunch of mysterious men who have the power of changing the course of events.

I thought that was a really good story line.
Though it ended not quite how I hope it would be.

For one moment I wanted to have a Fedora.LOL.I'm just sayin.

Had this for snack, appetizer? TAKO octopus I tried.

Had I Love yoo! for "dinner".
But my dad cooked dinner so I had to have dinner again in order to "show respect",haha.
Joel just have to talk & talk & talk............
which is a compliment ;)


Something unexpected happened in MPH bookstore.
I wanted to buy a book but was wondering if my mom would make a fuss about it,since she asked me 'not to buy anything back'. so I phoned her to ask if she allows me to have one.

Thank you Ian for making it short.
I really didn't know my mom would answer like that.
But at last I didn't buy. It's not the best choice yet.


However, the day went simple.
We didn't spend much. Merely fellowship we're talking about.
I enjoyed this period of time where I have all the time in the world waiting for college to start!

Enjoying my once in a life time longest holiday ;)

Thank you cindel :) I miss you too.

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